Emu Education

I’m not sure if it’s my warped perspective or just all the extra time I have on my minds, but sometimes I just have questions that I really have no answers for and I really don’t know who to ask. Soooo…. I just thought I’d throw these out there and maybe somebody knows somebody whose cousin worked for this guy that knows the answer (which is probably similar to how John Kerry decided the answers to his questions). So here is the question that grabbed me today. (This was the second time I was grabbed, but there’s no need to mention my sexual escapades in this post *puffed up chest*)

1. At the pharmacy, and at several others, they sell this product that is similar to like Bengay (no, not recently…BAHAHA), it’s called “Heat Activated Emu Oil Sore Muscle Cream”. So my question is how do they get that Emu Oil? Do they like milk the Emus? Which begs the question, how do you get an Emu to stand still long enough to milk it? Perhaps that’s not the method though. Maybe there’s some kind of Emu Blender and you toss one in the blender and then boil it and the oil comes to the top and you can skim it off. Any ideas?


2. Why exactly do I need Emu Oil in my ‘sore muscle cream’ anyway? I had never really considered Emus to be especially useful animals, so who was it exactly that discovered that Emu Oil helps sore muscles? I mean really, how random is that? Maybe someone was doing the artificial insemination (like with cows?) and while his/her arm was up there, he or she was like,

“Wow! Hey Ed. Come here a minute. You know how I had been talking about going to the doctor for my Carpal Tunnel Syndrome? Well I swear it don’t feel just about 100% better now! So tingly and soothing. Hey, hand me that (either milk pail or blender) we’re gonna be rich!”

Just lemme know if you can offer suggestions! Thanks!